Everything happens for a reason

I watched the movie "Happenstance" the other night. This movie illustrated how every little detail in our lives count. How we all have power to change the world by what we do. How there is a supernatural force that leads people to each other and there is a plan and a purpose for every encounter. How there is nothing left for chance.

I think of how strangers have made dramatic impacts on my life...and how running into an old friend can be a friendly reminder of my past and how far I have come. How a conversation with a friend or a note or a message has been naturally placed at the perfect time. How a bad or painful situation can turn into something good. I think of how the stars have aligned perfectly to make a magical night and how I've been lucky to see a falling one.

So if everything happens for a reason and every detail counts...than I resolve to make this year the best one. To make a difference with what I do and say...to work harder to achieve my goals and dreams and to live like it matters...even when I don't feel like it.

I'm moving to Europe

I'm always thinking of a way to begin to build a fortune for myself. I was thinking, with the US dollar weakening worldwide it might be wiser to move to Europe and begin there. Besides, with free healthcare and housing (if all else failed), I wouldn't have to worry about much else other than pursuing my dreams.

Plus, those english accents are irresitable;)

Love

I believe love can come in many forms, shapes and sizes.

But that true love...that one we all seek...is absolutely dreadful. It can be overwhelming to the point of exhaustion. It can frighten a person to the point of havoc. it can consume you and ache inside you like nothing else can... but yet it is so good. Beautiful and victorious. Above all other emotions...it is the best.

I can't wait to suffer through it all.

God, please share something with me

I am grateful for the trials I have had in life. Without them, ironically, I would be a broken, pathetic person.

The toughest moments for me are when I am dealing with something inside me that really isn't that significant outwardly. For example, I can deal with divorce, death, and illness easily because I have too, but if I'm dealing with something like self-esteem or anger it's a constant battle. It is so hard.

A battle no one can see or help you with. A continual arguement with yourself and desperate moments of surrender. That's hard. It's almost easier not to deal with it.

But I wonder...if I win the battle inside me can it, will it prevent some of the hardships in life. Will it make life a little lighter...a little easier to deal with?

Can I... someday... truly have peace?

What do you make of it?

What do you make of it?

A child's laughter
A blue, yellow, pink, purple sky
A long passionate kiss
A beautiful song
A Warm hug
A smile from the inside
A sparkle in someone's eye
A creative thought
An expression of love.....

To me it's Magic...

Elvis is a Legend

Today I heard an Elvis Christmas song for the first time this holiday season. I got really excited. I love Christmas and I love Christmas songs and I love Elvis.

I as I was listening to Elvis's version of Silver Bells, I began to think about him and the unique addition he made in the world of music. His beautiful vocal range and sound and his boldness to be different in the world of "a bunch of the same" made him a legend. Plus, he was absolutely adorable. Although he was before my time, I can only remember good things and good feelings when I think of him.

Unfortunately, I know there was another side of this legendary man that eventually took his life at an early age.

But I still see him as a legend.

Maybe, not everyone's contribution to this world is one that looks like Mother Teresa's. Maybe we all are not meant to help the poor, feed the homeless, and help sick children.

I do believe that we all are here not for ourself...but for others...but who is to say that there is only one way to do that. Should our individual contribution to this world be as unique as each one of us are.

Although Elvis's life seemed a little messy at times, he still did something great for people. He brought hope to many through his music and continues to do so. He did make a difference. Maybe our messy lives are meant to be messy...

Mirror

Sometimes I get so sick of myself. I'm always in thought. And I always think I'm right, until I prove myself wrong. I get on my own nerves. I can't even look in the mirror sometimes.

I wish I could be a little more free...and a little more ditsy...and not really care as much. A boob job would be nice too. Those types of girls have it made. Naaah, just kidding...but I am kind of jealous of them.

My problem is I care too much about everything. I drive myself crazy. I want to do, see, be, help, live, experience, feel, smell, touch, taste, embrace so many things. It's sometimes overwhelming.

I constantly live in a dream world of hope. But I have to, reality is to much to handle. If I begin think this is it in life, than I'm done...I give up. Haha...I'll dye my hair blonde, get a boob job, and live it up.

But it can't be, there is more.

wow

The answer must be in the attempt.

Phenomenal Woman

To my girlfriends- As a woman we need to realize the unique beauty and strength every one of us has. And when dating, we should seek a partner who recognizes our value.


Phenomenal Woman

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

~ Maya Angelo ~